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  • Are you someone looking to get your creative project out of your head and into the world?
  • Do you have so many ideas that you just wish someone could help you sort through and prioritise them?
  • Do you keep starting a project, but get sidetracked, and it gets put away in a draw for 'another day'?

– In this series of workshops I will accompany you through a process of creating your ideal life as a creative. I will hold your hand and assist you to make your creative dreams into reality. Buckle up for the ride and get ready to create!

TRANSCRIPT

Okay, and welcome, welcome everybody, to another installment of Dare to create, which happens every Sunday at 7 pm. UK time. So welcome to This Week of dare to create. If you can hear me, please do let me know, send me a little comment. Hopefully this week I'll see the comments last week I was having some trouble. And if you have not seen the other dare are to create workshops that happened on a Sunday, I invite you to check them out.

On the first week, we looked at creating a master list. Looking at the projects that you got goin' and choosing which ones to prioritize, and which ones to let go of, and perhaps which ones to schedule or delegate. And then we look to the second week at creating a vision of the life you want to create as an artist, or creative, or even the business you want to have as a creative or an artist. And so if you haven't checked out, those ones go have a look, if you're on Instagram, they're on IGTV and on Facebook, they are just on my page Dare Coaching and hypnotherapy and on the community daretobeseencommunity.com.

Now, these workshops are very interactive. So what I invite you to do is to actually have a piece of paper with you and a pen. Or if you prefer to speak instead of right, then what I would invite you to do is to have just your phone and record your voice on the phone. You can use any app on your phone, you can just search for a recorder up.

So now, the important thing that we're going to really look at today is going through a goal, looking at a goal a specific goal that is in alignment with your vision. So you've done your vision work, you know what you'd like in your life. Now we need to work backward to look at how are you going to achieve this goal? And how are you going to achieve this vision, and what kind of goals are you going to put in place so that this vision becomes true and real.

So for example, one of your goals, one of the vision might be that you want to live your life, as an artist as a creative, you want to make sure that you work as a creative. And in order to have enough money to survive, for example, you may need different income streams. So one of the goals that you may want to work on is the income stream, one specific income stream that you're going to focus on.

And maybe the first income stream is either something that you're really passionate about or if you need money now, then it needs to be something that is easy to do, something that you can do in a relatively short amount of time. So either way, the kind of goal that you choose always needs to be in alignment with the vision of your life, with your values.

But at the same time, you can decide which goal you're going to go for. In terms of whether it's a passion-driven goal or a money-driven goal. So decide which one is going to be and let's define the goal, the first thing we want to do as we want to state to this goal in positive terms, so not what you don't want, but what do you want instead of that?

What would you rather have? and really try to be specific talk about, you know, if I were to ask you, what is it that you want? When is it that you want it? where is this gonna happen? With whom, what is it ? you got to be specific because if it's just vague, you've got nothing to go for, okay? There's nothing that you can use to measure your success. So how will you know you've achieved that specific goal? A goal is not I want to be happy. That's not a goal. It's like, I want my life to be full of joy, what is gonna give me joy? And then let's look at one of the things perhaps that is going to give you joy, Be specific. How are things different? When you achieve this particular thing? This particular goal? And how does it affect your perspective on life?

Okay, let's use your imagination to pull it closer. So imagine you wake up tomorrow, and your goal is being achieved? What is it like? Speak it out loud, or write it in a comment or read it on a piece of paper. Okay, I'm going to give you a bit of time to do this. Is this what you really want? You know, once you've written it down? Does it feel like this is actually what you really want? If not, change it now. And how much influence Do you have over this? I want you to really think about it.

How are you responsible for making this happen? You know, what can you do to achieve this? Is it in your power to achieve this? Be honest with yourself. And now we want to check whether this goal is in balance with your life. What are the consequences of getting this for you? What are the consequences for you? What are the consequences for other people? For example, are there any negative consequences? How would this affect your home life, for example, or other people in your home or at work, or other things that are important to you?

We want to make sure that this goal is in balance with the rest of your life. I want you to think about what would happen if you do this if you actually make it happen. Answer this question. What would happen if you did? And what would happen if you didn't? So in other words, what does achieving this goal do for you? What higher purpose? Is it fulfilling? If you have this what sort of person will this make you? What else will you get if you get it?

And just answer these questions out loud for yourself. If you could have it right now, would you take it? If I had a magic wand, would you let me give it to you? I want to make sure that you really want this because sometimes we think we want something and then if somebody was to actually give it to us in that moment, we may find out we don't and that is a good thing because then we know there is an obstacle. So I'm gonna ask you a question.

Can you give me a rating on a scale of one to 10 for your level of confidence in your ability to make this happen? If it's not 10 then what would make it 10? So the next thing we want to do We want to explore and understand where you're at right now. So you've got an eight. So Charlotte, I want to ask you, before we move on, what would make it a 10? What would it take for it to be a 10? If you had, what?

Now, the next thing is we want to look at reality. Okay, we want to look at where you're at right now. So, I want you to think about what you've actually done already, to make this happen. Charlotte says : eliminating other things in my life that consume my energy. And what exactly are those things? You don't have to tell me, but I want you to write them down on your piece of paper. Exactly what are these other things in your life that consume your energy, these things that you actually can decide right now that they are not as important as your goal? And you can put them aside, you can put them on the back burner?

What are these things? Because often, we get sidetracked by urgent things. And that's fair enough. But other times, we may be sidetracked by things that we think are urgent, but actually are not or perhaps it's just shining object syndrome. Something easier, something that takes your attention in that moment. And it's just easier to get distracted than to actually get on to your goal. Okay, so just take note of what these things are that you can either schedule or let go of or delegate that are taking you away from your goal.

The next thing I want to ask you is what are the resources you already have. And this could be other people, it could be skills you have within yourself. And also the support of other people, support that you need to get this done, who could support you? Who could help you, for example, to get those other things out of your way? Once we've got these very practical elements, let's look at the emotions. Let's be really honest with ourselves, you know, what is the most difficult issue for you? What is the hardest, most challenging part of this goal for you?

Feel free to write it down or if you don't want to share that's okay. This is not for me is, it is for you to know, what is the most difficult issue? What is the challenge here? What's the emotion? And what way does this difficult issue actually affect you? Maybe you're afraid of something? What do you think you're afraid of?

And where in your body do you experience that tension? So in what ways do you inhibit yourself, do you inhibit your potential? What are the internal self-defeating thoughts? I am too old I'm too young I'm too whatever it may be. I'm not good enough. You know, those are your self-limiting beliefs. But they also reveal your emotions, okay, so what's contributing to the way that you're feeling and you're thinking about this?

Once you've got that, I want you to really think about what has led up to this, what else is fed into this Feeling into this belief? What is feeding the self-doubt? Is it a past experience perhaps that you had? Have you perhaps been in a place like this before? What happened? Have you responded to similar situations in the past? Is this something that keeps on happening? Do you see a pattern? And if there is, you know, what's going on inside you? describe to yourself the emotions that this situation brings to the surface.

Maybe it could be anxiety, it could be fear. Often it is. Be honest with yourself. And when you've looked at the past, let's also look at the future. Where do you see yourself going? You know, how do you want things to turn out instead? What would be the best possible outcome, you know, a compelling future that calls you. If you only felt more confident, If you only knew that you had all the skills that are needed, for example.

Or maybe you could access this from the perspective of someone else, someone that has belief in you someone that really believes in you, for example, it could be a partner, or it could be a parent or a teacher or a colleague, how do you think they would see this? What does it look like from that person's point of view? If you're with them? How would things look like from their perspective? And also, I invite you to look at your values, your principles, you know, what would it mean? What would it mean to be true to your beliefs?

And your principles in this situation? Now, what values do you hold that will influence your response? What's the real issue here? What does what makes it significant to you? We want to be really honest with where you're at first, because when we're not honest, where we can't go anywhere. And we're not looking at solutions yet. We're just being honest about what's actually happening emotionally. And also practically. We're building awareness right now. The next thing I'm going to ask you is to think about the goal.

Once again, we're going to go back to the goal. And I want you to think about what do you think are the primary five ingredients required in order for you to achieve this goal? Just five ingredients. I'm going to give you a minute or so to really think about this. What do you think are the five primary ingredients that are required in order for you to achieve this goal? So remember, you can always get back to this.

So it's okay if you haven't finished. But just think about what could you do about this? You know, what could you do to truly achieve this goal? What other potential courses of action can you think of? If you had unlimited resources? I know you don't. But let's imagine just to open our minds, that you had unlimited resources, and you knew you couldn't fail, then what would you try? What if all obstacles were removed?

What would you do then? you may want to think about, in order to open your mind, different angles. So for example, what would other people do? Someone who's super confident? Think about someone you know, who is very confident, very self-assured? What would they do to overcome obstacles? What have you seen them do in similar situations? Maybe you can imagine having a dialogue with the wisest person you can ever think of? What do you think they would tell you to do? If you got really radical, why would you try? What seems super off the wall?

Another way of looking at this is looking at what you've done in the past in situations that were challenging, maybe similar situations. And how could you fit this in what you're already doing? Because often, we may think all we need to find something totally new. But what actually worked for you in the past? And how could you fit it in with this new situation? what you're already doing, making it better, making it work better?

You could even as I said before, step into the shoes of someone that is incredibly creative. Someone is a radical thinker. What kind of options would they come up with? Who do you know that's like that? And what would they come up with? Now, once you have got a good picture of what's happening right now, what you've already done, so the present, right, we want to look at the obstacles, what's in your way, you know, what's standing in the way What do you need, that you don't have? It's important to look at the obstacle.

And how can you change your objectives or timetable to make this achievable? What resources can you tap into to overcome this obstacle? Or how have you overcome this obstacle or a similar one in a similar situation on the past? What could you change about you, that would change your situation that would change this obstacle? Because what I would like you to think about is that let's just assume for a minute, that perhaps this situation, yes, it is an obstacle, but maybe this situation is custom designed for your inner growth as a person.

And if that was true, then what's the opportunity here? Let me know what this opportunity is. This is very important. If the situation was custom designed for your inner growth, then what would be the opportunity for you? Because think about it, when we face adversity in life, we either are broken by adversity, or we survive it. Or it becomes a defining moment in our lives. So what response, would this make a defining moment for you?

What fears doubts, internal obstacles, are keeping you from moving forward? And what would it take for those obstacles to be completely gone? "stepping out of your shell" we got a comment. So stepping out of your shell basically means getting out of your comfort zone, being seen, daring to be seen daring to show who you really are. Yeah, and when we do that, we risk rejection. And that's why it's so scary, right? But we risk rejection, from the people that are not meant to be in our tribe. Because rejection is never about you.

That's the thing, right? rejection is never personal. It's about the other person. So actually, when we allow ourselves to be seen, we find our tribe, because the people that say, yes to us, are the people that are meant to be with us. But don't take it from me, because this is just my opinion. What matters is your opinion. So what really matters here is becoming aware. Okay? So stepping out of my shell is what's in the way... That's your obstacle.

So what would it take for this obstacle to be completely gone? If you were the best you can be the person you always wanted to be? What would you do? How would you overcome this obstacle? And I want you to actually answer this question because I've got my own answer. But my own answer might not be the right answer for you.

My answer is, we need to be courageous. We need to feel our fears. And yes, it's a cliche, do it anyway. Because being courageous doesn't mean not having fear. It just means having fear and deciding to do it anyway. And it does take guts, but the thing is the moment we step out of our comfort zone, the moment we take a risk, life becomes worth it. You know, it's not whether it's easy, it's whether it's worth it. But anything of any value is always going to involve effort, it will involve risk.

But when we embrace that risk, and we let go of wanting to control everything, then we become who we really are supposed to be, which is just who we always were. Without the cloak that was hiding us. And then the beauty gets to shine. Right? And the right people really appreciate it. And the people that are not meant to be with us, they don't appreciate it. And that's their thing. It's their stuff.

But this is a process that you need to go through yourself. So imagine yourself as a change agent, okay? If you saw yourself as powerful, instead of powerless, what would you do? What does it mean, for example, to step out of your shell, in practical terms? What is that you would do if you stepped out of your shell? Does it mean that you would do a video? Does it mean that you would go and talk to a stranger?

Does it mean that you would teach a class? What is it? That's what you need to do! The very thing that we're the most scared of doing, that's the thing we need to do. So what does it mean, in this example, to step out of your shell, and tell me if you want what these things are, but what I want you to do is to actually make a list of possibilities.

So it's not just one thing, it could be many things make, make it many possibilities. Think about all solutions, so to speak. Think outside the box. So what would you do if you really believed in yourself that you couldn't fail? If you believed you could change? That you could succeed? What are these things? What the possibilities? How would you step out of your comfort zone? What are those things you would do that you're not currently doing or have been until now too shy or scared to pursue? So these are your options, okay. Look at your options now.

Write them down or record them. And Charlotte, if you want to say yes when you've got them written down, so I know I can move on. I see. Zoey is here as well. So you can do the same, Zoey. Because when we've got the possibilities, now we want to look at what stands out to you. Maybe you have different options. I can make a video, I could write a letter, I could write an email, I could pitch something I could start a Facebook group, I could do a webinar. I could do a gig I could ... Tons and tons and tons of options. So once you've got these options, now what I want to ask you is what stands out? What's the most doable? What's the one you will do?

Because there's so many you could do but what I wanted to want to ask you is what do you want to do? What is the one option that would most effectively move you towards your goal right now? Which of these alternatives do you want? Which of these makes you excited? Which one of these are you going to act on? And I just want you to choose at least one. Just one that you can commit to. The one option you choose to act on? What exactly are you willing to commit to doing to move forward? And by when? be specific. You know, I'm going to make a video, a five-minute video of myself explaining what my businesses is about.

Be specific, what exactly you willing to commit to doing? And by when, what is one thing you could do now, which would have the most impact, we'll get the ball rolling, so to speak. Okay. Notice your language, notice how you're speaking to yourself. Now, you know, you're saying things like, oh, shoot, I could, someday, one day, because that's telling you don't really want to do it. Remember that you can choose, you can choose to do this or not.

So what do you need to change about this action step that would help you make a decisive choice? What will make it into something you really want to do? That from zero to 10 is going to make it 10? If it's not 10, then what's in the way? How can you make a 10? What prevents you from being a 10? How can you, for example, reduce the size of the task? Or maybe lengthen the time scale to make it a 10? What can you change to make it perhaps more realistic?

Or what could you do to increase your chances of getting it done successfully? If for example, it's something that requires a deadline, how confident are you that you will complete this step by the deadline? Maybe you need to chunk it down. If it's too big. Maybe you need to involve someone else that's going to help you make it happen.

Just make sure that all the obstacles are cleared. Okay. Thumbs up if the obstacles are clear. Because now we have gotten to the bottom of this. We're going to test it. Okay. Do you know exactly what to do? This is just the one little step okay? Do you know exactly what the step is? If not, you need to go back and look at the whole process again.

So you want to know exactly what to do next. And the step needs to be scheduled for a specific time, not one day but right now or tomorrow at eight o'clock. It needs to be specific. Don't leave it for tomorrow, tell yourself, okay, at this time, I'm going to do it tomorrow, and you can have that commitment. So summarize it, write it down in very specific points. This is what You've decided to do. Now go and do it.


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About the Author

Elisa Di Napoli is a Mindset Coach with 25 years of experience in holistic life coaching, clinical hypnotherapy, performance, and creativity based in Wellington. She is the author of the "Dare to Be Seen" series and practices as a musical artist. She specializes in helping creatives bring their projects to life, command the stage and magnify their presence so they can share their gifts with a larger audience. She also has vast experience in treating anxiety, helping with confidence, sleep problems and most psychosomatic disorders. She gives talks on wellbeing featuring various topics such as overwhelm, procrastination, goal setting, dealing with uncertainty and change and more.
She has been featured on radio and podcasts, and her articles have been published on blogs and online magazines. Elisa's background in comparative religion, music, and acting allows her to offer creative strategies for her clients, while her motto “dare to be seen” urges them to shine their light on the world.

Elisa

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