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  • Top 23 Tips to Start 2023 Better – Day 5

Written by Elisa Di Napoli / Updated on January 4, 2023  Reading Time minutes 

Go for it

Tip#5 for Today

Are you working for a boss who doesn't support and empower you? Super challenging, right? Many of my Senior level clients (contractors and full time) struggle with exactly this issue.

My tips for today focus on remembering how powerful and talented you are! 

If you're feeling unmotivated, unappreciated, or upset because of the behaviour of a Senior or any colleague who has influence, read on.

Brene Brown has a wonderful strategy which is to use, 'the story I am telling myself is....' to reframe and express moments when we doubt ourselves or feel insecure or angry or any other big emotions.

So if, for example, your Boss perpetually puts you down in meetings, the reframe goes something like this: 'The story I am telling myself is that I am not smart enough/brave enough/qualified enough to do XYZ competently. And my boss reinforces that every day in meetings which makes me feel humiliated'.

Then make a new story, 'I am well trained, likeable, competent and secure in my own abilities and I have choices in my career path. And how long I choose to enable his or her behaviour by not speaking up'. The second story helps us feel more empowered. And we always have choices!

Perhaps you love your job but hate your boss, so there may be instances where it's worthwhile flagging your issues to the boss, or the boss' boss! I did this in my late twenties and the Executive Director who seemed to have it in for me actually got fired instead!

Sometimes the time has come to consider applying for other opportunities. Somewhere you'd be valued and appreciated and perhaps advance more quickly.

One last tip, before you go into any sort of negotiation or discussion that may be challenging, write a list of your past successes. Anything that made you feel proud. It's a great confidence and self-esteem builder!

If you've enjoyed this fifth tip in the 23 tips to start 23 better series, please subscribe for more!

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